Where to begin? Gunn Music@Costano -- from before its conception until now -- has left me with too much to put down in words. But I might as well try and explain some of the profound and lasting impacts it has had upon my growing up in the last four years. My sister, Stephanie, went to Costano Elementary before I did, and I always heard about her students -- at that time, there were only one or two. So when I accompanied her in ninth grade, I was more than scared. In fact, I’d call the feeling I had as I entered the classroom to call for my first student pure terror. Stage fright, taking tests -- nothing could compare to looking into the eyes of twenty students and being faced with the expectation that you would somehow teach them how to play this four-stringed instrument. It broke my heart the first time I saw disappointment on my student’s face, when she realized that she could not simply pick up the violin and play like she expected. I felt it was somehow my fault; had I been a better teacher, maybe she wouldn’t have given up so easily or maybe she would have learned quickly enough to satisfy her desire to play. Through my time at GM@C, I have worked with nine students, teaching both piano and violin. Several of them I have seen taken away by parents who no longer wanted them in the after-school program, and a couple decided music simply was not for them. The last four years have taught me that the over-quoted phrase, “we must learn from our mistakes”, told to all students, should be told to all teachers as well. In a process of teaching a skill, disappointment and frustration are unavoidable -- obstacles are everywhere, and the incredible patience to overcome them develops over time.It took me about two years before I finally found the determination and drive to feel confident enough to challenge my students and earn their respect -- to banish the fear to tell my students when they were wrong. Instead of dreading the possibility of failing as a teacher, I allowed my enthusiasm for music to bring myself confidence, and make lessons both effective and fun for myself and my students. I came up with creative ways to allow students to play the songs they liked, and discovered different techniques of keeping them interested. Of course, I have yet to achieve perfection in balancing on the fine line between pushing students too hard and not meeting their expectations, but falling off each time has only brought me closer to finding the center. Gunn Music@Costano has been an adventure that, while tumultuous and nerve-wracking, helped shape me as a teacher, a leader, and a person. Today, nothing makes me happier than the students I leave behind who have found pleasure in creating and listening to music; I can only wish their futures to be bright as the ones I see in them now. Thank you to every single student of mine for all you have done for me, for now I say my final farewell to an incredible four years at Costano with a teary smile. I will miss you all. Love, Lily, Co-founder and 2010-2013 Leader
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